Well, this post lets us know that our Simple Country Bishop had a very restful weekend learning about jolly Olde England. (That, and - what else - an interview in this weekend's Sunday Times....)
His first discovery: We don't speak the same language:
"Every trip to a pub or restaurant is an ode to "two nations separated by a common language." I've learned that a "fool" is a creamy, mousse-like dessert. A "mess" is something similar, but, well, a mess! "Pudding" seems to be a name encompassing all desserts. If you order "cream pie," it's likely to be cake with whipped cream on top. And "spotted dick" -- let's not even go there!"
Actually, I've had spotted dick quite a few times. Depending on the pub, it's delicious. So why shouldn't we "go there?" Unless you are focused on.... Oh, right. That. Goodness knows what would have happened if someone asked him if he fancied a fag.
But our Simple Country Bishop is keeping a sharp eye out for homophobic code-words while he is "over there," and is quite concerned because someone called him something he doesn't understand:
"Today, in the press, I was called a "pantechnicon." I've looked it up and it means a "moving van." I still don't get it -- but can it be good?!"
Here's the quote, from the Sunday Times article linked above:
"The arrival of Robinson has not so much spoilt the party as driven a noisy pantechnicon right through it."
The Times never actually called him a "pantechnicon." Just that he is (symbolically) driving a moving van through the Lambeth Conference. Makes sense to me. But when you see everything as being about you, well......
And our Simple Country Bishop had a run-in with the future top priority of our Churches - tourism:
"I walked to St. Paul's Cathedral yesterday. A bit of a hike, but with a gem of a church awaiting me at the end of the journey. When I arrived, I discovered it cost 10 Pounds to get in (about $21). Crikey! Even if tourists have to pay in order to keep up these museum-like churches, I was still offended by the high charge and left without going in. Am I getting cranky in my old age?"
No, Bishop, you are not getting cranky. I quite agree with you here. But remember, it's not just England - try Boston, Massachusetts.
And cricket? He picked up on that pretty quick:
"Cricket is a game with impenetrable rules and played solely for the purpose of confirming that Brits are superior to the rest of the world."
And your problem with that is?....
UPDATE: Goodness me! How could I forget - the Simple Country Bishop drinking game stats. Light day today; should give your liver a rest:
I: 16
We: 3
Me: 3
Mine: 0
Total count: 22
God: 1
Lord: 0
Jesus: 0
Christ: 0
Total count: 1
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