How To Never, Ever Get Mentioned On This Blog.

And I mean, never, never, never, ever.

Just send me an email or comment - out of the blue and I have no idea who you are - asking me to hawk, or push, or link to something for you on this humble blog. I don't care how hot you think it is, or how famous you think you are, or how many famous actors, politicians, or bloggers you say just adore you, or HOW MANY WORDS YOU PUT IN CAPS, or how patronizing you are. It. Ain't. Happening. Suck wind, bucko.

Why?

Because that's called advertising. That's why. You want me to help sell your product, fine - but we want compensation. That's not a new concept. Heck, even PBS is doing it nowadays. So if you're smart enough to figure out how to contact me, I'm sure you can figure out where to send a business proposal for some of my sidebar space. Or, just send the check. I take advances. (I've got a new baby coming in a few months that needs feeding.)

Now I'm not talking about folks I know, or folks who at least take the time to personally introduce themselves. I try my best to respond to those, one way or another, and I have made some good Net friendships that way. But c'mon - if your email begins "Dear Mr. RED STICK RANT...." it's a dead giveaway you have no bloody clue who I am.

And I shall give you the same level of respect you showed me. DELETE. It's a beautiful thing.