Jefferts Schori: God says,"Don't FedEx Me, Bro!"

The Great Helmsperson of The Episcopal Church™, The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori (who I understand hates to be called “Kate”), once more opines about the whole state of Christ's Church her Church and the world. And yes, boxes are involved.

But first, Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori takes care to remind everyone that society is really to blame for The Current Unpleasantness™ in The Episcopal Church™:

“I think we live in an increasingly polarized society and these particular actions in the church echo that.”

Falling attendance figures? It's society. Folks not willing to accept the dumping of 2,000 years of Christian teaching? It's society. Excessive cow farts? It's society. And not just any society, either - Western society in general, and America in particular. But I digress.

"Jefferts Schori argues the number of congregations leaving the church is not large – roughly 1 percent of the 7,600 congregations, by her count. “It gets a lot of press and a lot of play, but it's a relatively small portion of the church.”

The Episcopal Church™ is loosing hundreds of people a week on average, and she's talking number of congregations. You gotta giver her credit - if this gig doesn't work out, Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori has a great future in cherry picking. Or marketing for Bear Stearns. And what about that "small portion of the church" that still ignorantly believes the Resurrection actually happened? They're in denial:

“Voting to leave is the denial of the ability to live in tension with people who don't agree with you about everything,” she said."

Oy. First of all, could you please, finally, tell us what "living in tension" means, Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori? Cables on suspension bridges "live in tension"; not people. People who "live in tension" usually end up needing Valium. Or rehab. (Me, I've always been a compression kinda guy.) Second, I go to church every Sunday with lots of folks who don't agree with me about everything. We don't agree on sports teams, our favorite restaurants, who we are voting for in the next election, who will win the next American Idol, and on and on. (Want to side-track a Men's Club meeting? Ask this simple question: Ginger, or Mary Ann?) But what we DO agree on is our belief in the central tenants of our Faith - which we willingly recite without crossing our fingers. Isn't that, after all, why we show up every Sunday?

Apparently not, says Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori:

“You don't all have to profess exactly the same understandings of the central tenets of the faith,” she added. “What's important is to worship together.”

How's that for a theology - we don't care what you believe (unless we don't like it - see below), just show up. And once more Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori sounds the alarm against cardboard containment:

"Schori is not a biblical literalist. Take the six-day story of Creation in Genesis, for example. “It's too good a story to believe it literally,” she said, “It's got too much meaning to be boxed up in that small of an understanding.”

And reprises an oldie-but-goodie:

Seeing Jesus as the only way to redemption also “puts God in a very small box,” she said.

So let's recap: We don't care what you believe, just show up; and anyone who takes the Bible seriously is stuffing God in a FedEx box. I can't wait to see that added to our Baptismal Covenant. I wonder Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori, wasn't it Jesus Christ himself that said God was in that "very small box?" Did you ever think that maybe He had a reason to be in that "very small box? Um, no, you never thought that:

“Most Christians believe that Jesus died for the whole world. If you believe that, then to say that some people are beyond redemption would appear to deny that,” she said."

I too, believe that Christ did die for the whole world, Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori, and that no one is beyond redemption. But unlike you, I believe there are terms and conditions. I am willing to accept those terms and conditions, even when they are often hard to do (love your enemies, etc.). But to say that we are redeemed simply by the act of our birth is to deny our baptism - and our Baptismal Covenant. Are we still redeemed if we reject Christ? If yes, then what's the point of the Church?

"Either way, she adds, “I think it is up to God, not for us, to judge.”

Couldn't agree more, Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori. Judging others is not up to us; but alerting others to the consequences of sin, and pointing them to salvation, is up to us.

And of course, Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori, you just had to brig up the "prophetic gift":

"She advocates for the inclusion of gays and lesbians. “If we were focused on what holy living looks like, generally, without focusing on the gender of the people involved, I think we would be a lot farther down the road,” she said."

And what, exactly, does "holy living" look like, Kate The Most Rev. Katherine Jefferts Schori? Isn't there, like, a book on that or something?

"And she maintains news outlets are way too focused on the threat of schism. “The media loves conflict,” she said. “Feeding people in a soup kitchen or building a school in Haiti ranks at a lower priority in much of the public interest.”

A modest suggestion: If you want to raise the priority of those things with the media, a few well-placed "Please do not feed the Bishop"signs would be in order.